Now this blog has been inspired by someone. I know on most of my posts I tend to speak from personal experience but, seeing as how I have never been a sugar-daddy for anyone, I can only relay the thoughts of said muse. What I can offer though is my belief that money should be one of the last reasons you fall in love. This, to most people, I think is a given. Yet it continues to amaze me how people can rank monetary issues above things like trust, fun, and chemistry. On the flipside, it also amazes me that people use their financial status in such a way that makes them believe they are more worthy of love than others. Throwing money at an unhappy partner to keep them quiet certainly isn't a scenario I want to have in a relationship, and if that tactic works then the person you are throwing the money at clearly isn't with you for your companionship. When being told of my friends situation, I listened as best I could, and was in fact given the Beatles quote by her as a summative quote of her story. She had what others would describe as 'it all'. She was in Australia, was given a job by her partner's parents, had clothes bought for her, was taken to fancy champagne dinner parties; was essentially given whatever she wanted. Now, the tragedy of this is that from the start she loved him for him. She fell for him and who he was. However, it would appear his answer to anything was money, and that sort of life became incredibly overbearing and, ultimately, was what sent her coming back to the simple life in the UK. Just having the money changed his priorities, his actions, and how he dealt with those he loved. It is the above lyric in action. Now, I'm not going to sit here and deny that money can be appealing - God knows it is what we work for, and the vast majority of the population concur that it would certainly take the stress of the everyday out of life. If anything, you could say that having financial freedom allows you to be more free to experience opportunities in which to find love, and to be in the right mindset to make that love work. I think the problem arises when people make money the substitute for everything I believe should be valued in a relationship. Yes, times are hard - they always are and they always have been. Yes, with that in mind a partner with money is a bonus, but that is all it should be: a bonus. I must admit, whenever I have been in a relationship, I have always loved spoiling the one I'm with, but have always yearned to be able to give them more. More of what I think they want. More material things because I thought that was important. Trying to show that I'm a good guy, practically shoving it in their face, saying 'Look how much I love you by how much I give you'. It's a dangerous thought. In some ways I am happy I didn't have that opportunity. By thinking these things are important, rather than just loving each other and being grateful for the things you share that money can't buy, you can shift perspective in both parties. Again, as I have never been in the position to spoil someone as much as I think they deserve to be spoiled, this is merely conjecture. I think money can buy you the illusion of love. It can buy you a facade. Would I want that? I think not. I'll compare it to my view on religion: I am not a religious person, I am a child of science and always will be. But I believe religion holds great value to many people so would never debunk its worth, it's just not my bag. My thoughts are this: If both myself and a devout religious person had nothing, no job, no family, and were living on the streets, I, to all intents and purposes would indeed have nothing - but a religious person would still have their faith. They would still have faith in their lives. I see this as being the same with love and money. You could take two people, rich people, and strip them of all their wordly goods. One would have nothing, but if the other was in love, truly in love, then the loss of all those things would be secondary. They would have love in their lives. So they would have everything they need.
Alan
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